Why Your New Year’s Resolutions Aren’t Sticking

Guest post from my wise and enlightened life coach friend Amanda McPherson. She was voted one of Austin's 19 best life coaches and offers a refreshing and honest outlook on dating and creating a life full of passion, confidence and intention.  

If you're like a lot of people, you are feeling some need to set some goals or intentions for the New Year. But, why?

Because you think you "should"?

Because you've heard it's a good thing to do?

Well, I'm here to tell you those reasons aren't going to keep your goals alive for very long. They’re sure to die quicker than a wedding engagement on The Bachelor if you don’t know the why behind your new goals and intentions.

Some people who are a lot smarter than me conducted some legit studies of human behavior when it comes to goals and such. The evidence basically said “yeah, people don’t implement changes in their lives just because it’s good for them”...makes sense, right?

If it only took intellectual awareness about what is best for us to inspire change, none of us would smoke cigarettes, abuse drugs and alcohol, overspend, gossip etc.

So, like most of the topics I explore in my blog, it comes back to our roots.

Why are your goals important to you? Are they rooted in something meaningful and value-based?  It’s important that you feel emotionally connected with the why behind your goals.

So, if you are having trouble finding the passion and excitement to keep your goals alive, maybe you aren't focusing enough on why it’s on your list.  

For example, let’s use the ever-popular New Year’s goal of losing weight. The why behind this goal is going to be different for everybody.

* I want to have more energy to play with my children.

* I want to feel more confident when I go on dates.

* I want to be active and travel late into my life.

* I love shopping for nice clothes and I want it to feel fun again.

Here's a little exercise for you. If you already have a list of goals/intentions, jot them down (or type them into the computer)  Yeah, like right now. Just do it! Now, for each goal, write down at least three reasons why each goal is important to you.

Don't judge your reasons why. Just be honest about why you want to meet that goal.

Are you surprised by anything you wrote? Do you feel more excited about these goals when you see why they are important to you? I would imagine you’re feeling some emotion about your goals right now (hopefully some emotion that inspires!).

From this point forward, refer to the list of whys to motivate you when you’re losing your desire to implement the positive changes you want to see in your life. This list of heart-led, value-driven desires is going to get you a lot farther down the road than just a simple list of to-dos.

And, perhaps most importantly, if you can’t find some really compelling whys behind a goal, drop it like a hot potato. There is no good reason to beat yourself up about goals that aren’t rooted in your values and true desires. If you find that your goals are ringing a little hollow, spend some time thinking about how you want to feel. Once you’ve decided on some ways you’d like to feel, write down some action items that you could take that will move you closer to that feeling. Voila’! Now you have your measurable goals and action items.

Oh, and if you would like a little help getting some clarity, focus and excitement around your 2017 goals, join me and other fabulous ladies on Sunday, January 22nd for my Vision Board Workshop. It’s a great opportunity to meet other like-minded women, laugh, dream, and start manifesting the life you deserve. It is almost sold out, so don’t wait!


Amanda is a trained Life Coach and holds a Master's Degree in Counseling. As a recovering risk-avoiding scaredy-cat, she is passionate about empowering women to live and love boldly. Amanda shares her inspiration through personal coaching, corporate training, workshops and international retreats. Her writing has also been featured in several on-line publications. Learn more about Amanda at lifecoachamanda.com or on Facebook